KQQQ in Pullman, you had better watch out! According to Tom Foley, you're the problem and you need to be dealt with.
And he means to; with the Fairness Doctrine. KQQQ, talk radio AM 1150, the home of conservative mega-star Rush Limbaugh, decided to dispense with its last liberal and give its listeners what they want, another conservative. And so, starting this Monday, they jettison their last liberal and replace him with G. Gordon Liddy yes, that G. Gordon Liddy.
On a Spokane talk show recently, Tom Foley grudgingly acknowledged that Rush Limbaugh was entitled to his opinions, adding ominously, ''I suppose, but'' and when a liberal Democrat says, ''but,'' it renders everything he said previously meaningless ''what I would like to hear on radio is ...'' And so on and so forth. Who cares what Tom Foley wants to hear on his radio? In a free market, you and I decide, not the ruling class.
Mr. Foley insists that the Fairness Doctrine, by imposing a diversity of opinion, enhances, rather than restricts, freedom of speech. But, only a truly diseased mind could arrive at the conclusion that forcing someone to say what you want to hear is free speech.
Nothing is more democratic than a free market. Regardless of what Foley would have you believe, freedom is not the right to elect the administrators of your tyranny. Somebody who might never have even registered to vote can exercise freedom innumerable times every day, by simply choosing from among the many consumer products available on the shelves, or in the case of radio, by turning that dial. Tuning your radio is an even easier expression of freedom than registering to vote at the welfare office.
KQQQ made an honest and sincere and I might add, voluntary effort to balance its programming. Until about a year ago, a fellow named Alan Colmes followed Rush Limbaugh. The collective sound of radios being turned off at noon was almost deafening. People just didn't want to listen to him. Mr. Colmes was afflicted with the disease that afflicts all liberals. He lacked depth.
Liberals, unlike conservatives, are not philosophical. Their ideology is, in fact, nothing more than a collection of bumper sticker slogans they've memorized over the years. It didn't take long to scroll through these slogans and then Mr. Colmes would start at the beginning again.
Besides, Mr. Colmes was boring. Until the day he was replaced, Alan Colmes' jokes were essentially based on Ronald Reagan taking naps, and Dan Quayle's spelling prowess. Yuk, yuk.
So KQQQ's next effort to balance Rush was Larry King. Larry King merely apes the opinions of the Hollywood left. That puts him firmly in Bill and Hillary's camp. In their efforts to balance Rush, KQQQ transmitted two boring hours of Larry.
After a while, the second hour of his show was replaced by the Dr. Dean Edell show. Apparently, listeners preferred conversations about female problems to Larry King's cheerleading. Freedom expressed itself again.
I am acquainted with the owners of KQQQ, and I can tell you that they are very pleasant people. I have no idea what their political or philosophical leanings are but, I do know that they have a payroll to meet and a mortgage to pay. They have a daughter in college and two sons who will, before long, be off to college as well. In other words, they have bills to pay just like everybody else.
If they are coerced into carrying programs which does not appeal to a large enough audience, their advertising revenue will decline, and, who knows, they might not be able to continue to carry the Rush Limbaugh show or even persevere in the talk format, which of course, would suit Foley just fine. If Limbaugh must be balanced, then KQQQ would have to fill much of the rest of its air time with low-rated shows for which they could charge little in advertising. That means that for 21 hours a day, their station would produce little revenue. Three hours of Rush Limbaugh would have to pay for 24 hours of programming.
As I work in agriculture, my life is enriched by contact with students from all over the world. More than once, I have had students from China who were walking through my lab stop and stare in amazement at my radio. ''This would never be permitted in my country,'' they observe. If Mr. Foley gets his way, what those Chinese students hear in the future will be far more familiar to them.