Today is Thursday, the 98th day of 2010. There are 267 days left in the year. Today is National Day Without Shoes Day. It's also National Soggy Sock Day. Isn't that a coincidence?
Top 10 signs the redneck's house
is haunted
10. Can of chew mysteriously floats through the air.
9. Blood drips out of the simulated wood paneling.
8. The eyes on the velvet Elvis painting move.
7. The room is spinning, and you're not even through the second case of beer.
6. Car in front yard is levitating.
5. That mysterious scratching below the floorboards? The Telltale Raccoon.
4. The chain the ghost rattles is attached to his wallet.
3. You feel an eerie presence every time "Free Bird" plays on the radio.
2. Dale Earndhart bed sheets have eyeholes cut in them.
1. Ghost is completely invisible except for the tobacco juice running down his chin.
Pickin' and groanin'
Once upon a time, there was a haunted house on the outskirts of the town. The house was avoided by the town folk, since the ghost that lived there was feared by all.
One day, an enterprising journalist decided to get a big scoop by photographing the fearsome phantom. When he entered the house armed with only his camera, the ghost descended upon him, clanking chains and rattling the rafters.
The reporter gulped and quickly shouted, "I mean no harm. I just want your photograph."
Turns out the ghost was a bit of a ham and a shameless self promoter and agreed to pose for a number of shots in order to make headlines.
The reporter rushed back to the newspaper and downloaded the images. To his dismay, all of the photos were terribly underexposed and all that was visible was some murky images of old furniture.
So what's the moral of the story?
The spirit was willing, but the flash was weak.
Wordits
We've decided to try a new game. We'll list a word and two possible definitions. You choose the correct one.
DUCAT
Definition No. 1 - A men's undergarment often worn by artistocrats during the Napoleanoic era.
Definition No. 2 - Any of several gold or silver coins formerly used in some European countries.
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Poeple lliw eccatp ouyr edsai mhcu reom lrydaie fi uyo ellt tehm atht Ijanbmen Iankrlfn dsai ti trfsi.
ANSWERS
Dtiuyspt tog su otni itsh esms. Ywh acn't ti etg su tuo? - Stupidity got us into this mess. Why can't it get us out?
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Susan Engle, Edge editor, may be contacted at edge@lmtribune.com; The Edge, 505 Capital St., Lewiston, ID 83501; (208) 848-2228; or by fax, attn: Edge, (208) 746-1185.
