May 14, 1977 — Nov. 9, 2024
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Stephen Joseph Ashley, 47, of Spokane, passed away Saturday, Nov. 9, 2024. He was born on May 14, 1977, in Grangeville, to Leann and the late Normand Ashley. Stephen’s larger-than-life presence was matched only by his boundless generosity and humor, and he leaves behind a world brighter for having known him.
Stephen grew up in Lewiston, and his love for learning led him to Lewis-Clark State College and the University of Idaho, where he earned not one, but three degrees. His career culminated in a fulfilling role as a software engineering manager.
Known for his uncanny ability to turn strangers into friends, Stephen couldn’t visit a place twice without being recognized. His charisma was magnetic, and his sense of humor — smart and full of snark — was unforgettable. When he wasn’t cracking jokes, Stephen was an avid player of Magic: The Gathering and World of Warcraft. His passion for games went beyond just playing; he was the proud owner of J&S Card Games, a card shop that became a hub for his friend group and a place where countless friendships were forged. It was through this shared love of cards that he formed lifelong bonds, including his closest friendship with his “brother-from-another-mother,” Bob Selzler, and his greatest love, his wife, Katie. It only took him 16 years of asking her to be his Valentine before she said yes, a testament to their deep connection — and his unparalleled determination. Together, they shared a love story rooted in the magic of both cards and connection.
Stephen’s passion for the unexpected extended to his musical tastes, favoring everything from Rush (with cats named Alex and Geddy) to guilty pleasures like Limp Bizkit and Vanilla Ice. He never failed to surprise, always opting for the weirdest thing on the menu at restaurants and ordering his food “to go” from drive-thrus, much to the bemusement of anyone in the car with him. Stephen loved wrestling and found a home away from home with the Relentless Wrestling crew, who became his second family.
Above all, Stephen was a devoted and proud father to his son, Spencer, who was his world. The epitome of a white knight, Stephen believed in rescuing those in need, even if it meant giving them countless chances. He inherited a spirit of generosity from his father, Normand, and delighted in choosing thoughtful gifts for his loved ones. His love for family was so great that he even braved camping trips, ensuring every camping adventure was filled with laughter, warmth and unforgettable memories.
Stephen leaves behind his beloved wife, Katie Ashley; treasured son, Spencer Ashley; sister, Tamara Johnson, and her husband, Ben Johnson; his mother, Leann Ashley; niece, Ashley Johnson; nephew, Robert Johnson; his dearest friend Bob Selzler; longest standing confidant Tom Lightfield; two beloved godchildren; and many cherished cousins. He was preceded in death by his father, Normand.
Funeral services will be held at 1 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 16, at English Funeral Chapel, 1700 N. Spokane St., Post Falls. To honor Stephen’s legacy, friends and family will gather to celebrate his life, sharing stories and laughter at 3 p.m. at Trailbreaker Cider, 2204 N. Madison St., Liberty Lake, Wash.
Stephen will be remembered for his wit, his open heart, and the indelible impact he left on everyone he met. He is gone but will never be forgotten. Rest in peace, Stephen. Your magic lives on.
